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Well at least someone's keeping it real.
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Sorry Frank, I just don't see how putting Mr/Miss/Mrs on the top of a letter and a handwritten request for referrals makes it personalized. Do you have something in the body of the letter, like a shared experience or something that personalizes it? I get letters from realtors every day addressed to me or my wife and they go straight in the round file.
I would definitely not send an "e-card". I sometimes get those and they are deleted as fast as the birthday card I receive from my P&C agent is thrown away that is sent out by State Farm. My agent doesn't even know that I'm having a birthday.