When to involve Family members/Dementia?

[somarco]

I would never suggest fill-in-the-blank legal docs. Could be well worth the few $$ to have properly drafted will, POA's and health care directive as well as trust(s) if warranted.

 

[kgmom219]

I've had to make these calls a few times. OF COURSE you are dreading it, but it always goes very well and the dependent is very receptive and appreciative.

I wouldn't go as far as saying "you need to do something", I would just say "I'm not comfortable taking the application at this time".

One time, I had to call a Financial Advisor, because the client (who had been an actuary) had totally lost it. As in, she couldn't add 3+4. It was horrible. They had no children, so I called the FP and said "I'm very concerned and cannot make any changes at this time. I need the next of kin information". So he called her and called me back with "HOLY S**T. She's lost it." And he started dealing with the requirements.

She called me two weeks later. Totally lucid. She was calling anyone she had talked to, based on her call log. She had an undiagnosed UTI which caused the fog. I started crying.

Moral of the story: don't assume dementia/alzheimers. You never know.

 

[WinoBlues]

I texted the daughter and she said she would be glad to talk to me, hard to tell from a text but seemed pretty reasonable sort. Dont know if she needs to go all the way to POA--but she will soon. Daughter will call me this afternoon

Just a suggestion. Document everything in the file. When you talk to the daughter send her a summary email and ask her to reply. Print the emails and put them in the file.

CYA

 

[Todd King]

Years ago I sold a small life policy to a nice older woman. She was very lucid. We discussed the policy, she got her checkbook & signed the check for the first month's premium & the eft form. Everything seemed business as usual. Then a few months later, her son called the carrier's home office & said that she had dementia & shouldn't have bought the policy. The carrier cancelled & refunded all premium. I had no idea. I felt a little scuzzy because I would never want to take advantage of anyone. In your case, I think it is fine to discuss it with the daughter. I'm sure she is aware of the deteriorating situation.

I had a lady that I sold a Med Supp, FE, and LTC to one day. Now you know the LTC phone interview can be a bear, but she passed with flying colors. About 2 weeks go by and all of her policies came in. I delivered them to her. No problem so far. She was very please that I was able to help her save some money on her Med Supp and get her the other 2 policies that she needed. Enough said...I go on about life.

About 1 week later (1 week before Thanksgiving), her son called me out of the blue and wanted me to come by and speak with him about all the policies. Problem is that he can only be there on Thanksgiving Day. No problem. I go to see him at her house in the middle of the afternoon. As soon as we sat down at the kitchen table, he said, "I want to know how in the world you were able to get her insured when she has Alzheimer's? WHAT????

I had no idea and there was absolutely no indication of it on either of the 2 days I was there. He said he was surprised that I didn't know, but at the same time could understand that I had probably caught her on 2 of the best days she's had in a while.

About that time she came out from the back of the house. This little old, very nice lady wanted to know who the hell that was in her house and that her and her husband (been dead for years) had done nothing wrong and the FBI didn't need to be in her house! Well, I was wearing a suit.

 

[Jon Dough]

All went well. She called and her Mom had spoken to her about me by name, asked her previously if she would meet with me (and then forgot she did so)

I just said "I can't tell you everything but I CAN tell you I don't think she is capable of making solid decisions on her own" and she said "welcome to my world!"

Of all things the daughter is PREGNANT and doesnt need this right now. So daughter, son in law and client are going to meet on a Saturday sometime soon. I like the documenting idea-will do that

THANKS TO ALL

 

[kgmom219]

I had a lady that I sold a Med Supp, FE, and LTC to one day. Now you know the LTC phone interview can be a bear, but she passed with flying colors. About 2 weeks go by and all of her policies came in. I delivered them to her. No problem so far. She was very please that I was able to help her save some money on her Med Supp and get her the other 2 policies that she needed. Enough said...I go on about life.

About 1 week later (1 week before Thanksgiving), her son called me out of the blue and wanted me to come by and speak with him about all the policies. Problem is that he can only be there on Thanksgiving Day. No problem. I go to see him at her house in the middle of the afternoon. As soon as we sat down at the kitchen table, he said, "I want to know how in the world you were able to get her insured when she has Alzheimer's? WHAT????

I had no idea and there was absolutely no indication of it on either of the 2 days I was there. He said he was surprised that I didn't know, but at the same time could understand that I had probably caught her on 2 of the best days she's had in a while.

About that time she came out from the back of the house. This little old, very nice lady wanted to know who the hell that was in her house and that her and her husband (been dead for years) had done nothing wrong and the FBI didn't need to be in her house! Well, I was wearing a suit.

CLASSIC.

 

[Jon Dough]

I had a lady that I sold a Med Supp, FE, and LTC to one day. Now you know the LTC phone interview can be a bear, but she passed with flying colors. About 2 weeks go by and all of her policies came in. I delivered them to her. No problem so far. She was very please that I was able to help her save some money on her Med Supp and get her the other 2 policies that she needed. Enough said...I go on about life.

About 1 week later (1 week before Thanksgiving), her son called me out of the blue and wanted me to come by and speak with him about all the policies. Problem is that he can only be there on Thanksgiving Day. No problem. I go to see him at her house in the middle of the afternoon. As soon as we sat down at the kitchen table, he said, "I want to know how in the world you were able to get her insured when she has Alzheimer's? WHAT????

I had no idea and there was absolutely no indication of it on either of the 2 days I was there. He said he was surprised that I didn't know, but at the same time could understand that I had probably caught her on 2 of the best days she's had in a while.

About that time she came out from the back of the house. This little old, very nice lady wanted to know who the hell that was in her house and that her and her husband (been dead for years) had done nothing wrong and the FBI didn't need to be in her house! Well, I was wearing a suit.

I had a lead from a carrier---went to see her--nondescript ranch in an older but nice part of town. We chatted and I did her MAPD application and I told her (as I tell every new MAPD enrollee) to call ME if there are questions about if its the right plan, when can she change etc and customer service for how much is this co-pay etc.

I could see her getting mad so I beat it out of there. She called the carrier as soon as I left and said I told her to NEVER call me. She was also unhappy that I parked in front of her house. When asked why she said "Then the murder squads will know Im home"

I STILL had to do a one hour "Remedial" so called "training"

 

[yorkriver1]

Some years ago, I was ready to do a large face amount life policy, but the client kept coming by to pay an existing premium payment that had been paid already. I reminded him each time. After the second time, I realized, no deal on the new life policy. Not a competent party, per contract law. This client had family close by, who could help, and I talked to them.

Here is a resource, if a family member seems overwhelmed by the news of a relative's dementia/Alzheimer's. The Alzheimers Association has a website for family, sufferers and caregivers/spouses. One part is an online support board. Some caregivers have their stress and isolation relieved by connecting with others in the same situation.
www.alzconnected.org

 

[Life Hawk]

I had a lady that I sold a Med Supp, FE, and LTC to one day. Now you know the LTC phone interview can be a bear, but she passed with flying colors. About 2 weeks go by and all of her policies came in. I delivered them to her. No problem so far. She was very please that I was able to help her save some money on her Med Supp and get her the other 2 policies that she needed. Enough said...I go on about life.

About 1 week later (1 week before Thanksgiving), her son called me out of the blue and wanted me to come by and speak with him about all the policies. Problem is that he can only be there on Thanksgiving Day. No problem. I go to see him at her house in the middle of the afternoon. As soon as we sat down at the kitchen table, he said, "I want to know how in the world you were able to get her insured when she has Alzheimer's? WHAT????

I had no idea and there was absolutely no indication of it on either of the 2 days I was there. He said he was surprised that I didn't know, but at the same time could understand that I had probably caught her on 2 of the best days she's had in a while.

About that time she came out from the back of the house. This little old, very nice lady wanted to know who the hell that was in her house and that her and her husband (been dead for years) had done nothing wrong and the FBI didn't need to be in her house! Well, I was wearing a suit.

Early in my career I sat with a woman and sold her a small cancer plan. I stat their while her dog threw-up on the floor twice and then ate it... you guys don't know me, but that is enough to make me gag which I did several times (I actually wanted to hurl) . Stood my ground got everything I needed and then out the door I went. 2 days later her son called and explained his mom had Alzheimer's and he needed to cancel the policy. He was a nice guy and understood what happened but I was in shock... I spent the whole time talking to her thinking it was her dog that had a problem. Lesson learned.

 

[Life Hawk]

I STILL had to do a one hour "Remedial" so called "training"

Just saw this part... what did they train you on... how properly give an MRI?