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What? Confusing
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Have a strong feeling they didn't use an agent for this change. This sounds consumer driven. I think they didn't ask for help.
I always make sure the primary is EXACTLY what they want. Contingent can be done also, but can also be done later if they choose. I hate to hear stories like this... apparently it happens all the time.
Nice step daughters. Sad.
And sometimes people have "other" people besides their spouse as beneficiary. Maybe he didn't know because she didn't tell him. I have several clients where the spouse is not the primary.