You know you're a Final Expense agent when...(fill in the blank)

[Life Hawk]

When you walk in a house where the thermostat is set at 90 degrees and the client forgot to empty the commode as she will not let me leave the door open on a beautiful 50 degree day cuz she cold! Nothing like fermented stench baking into my clothes. I bailed within 2 minutes plus I stepped in some random liquid from the garbage bag sitting near the front door. Only in Chitown

How about the younger folk who think dirty dippers are best kept on the front stoop just outside the door?!!?

 

[shonceman]

How about the younger folk who think dirty dippers are best kept on the front stoop just outside the door?!!?

Or dropped in the parking lot right where I'm about to step when I get outta my car!

 

[Life Hawk]

Or dropped in the parking lot right where I'm about to step when I get outta my car!

Ha Ha Ha! Know what you mean. Seems like the new ones just sort of disintegrate.

 

[goillini52]

When you walk in a house where the thermostat is set at 90 degrees and the client forgot to empty the commode as she will not let me leave the door open on a beautiful 50 degree day cuz she cold! Nothing like fermented stench baking into my clothes. I bailed within 2 minutes plus I stepped in some random liquid from the garbage bag sitting near the front door. Only in Chitown

If you're going to be a real FE agent, you need to dress for the job.

 

[ncaggie]

Walk into a local house and guy says your a man of god, throws a flag over you that has a blue star and has u pray with him.

 

[Todd King]

Not only in Chitown. Dallas, too. A real insurance man would have written the policy, then get in the car and drive a little ways. Then pull over and vomit!

My first debit was serving clients in southeastern Virginia in the brackish backwaters around the Great Dismal Swamp. In the summer, the humidity was seriously intolerable. A lot of my clients had these big room-filling furnaces in their living room. The old people were scared to turn out the pilot light in case they couldn't get it back on when it turned cold again in 6 months! They were also apparently scared to open any windows! So, if I got there when they were boiling greens, it was pretty rugged! But on some days, I was about 20 minutes from the ocean, so I kept a pair of swimming trunks in the car. I'd take a break & go jump in for a bit, then back to work!

Pungo? Lot of snakes in that area too.

 

[shonceman]

Pungo? Lot of snakes in that area too.

Yup. Pungo & Back Bay. Don't even get me started on snakes!

Except this one: One day while driving between clients in Back Bay, I saw the biggest water moccasin I have ever encountered crossing the road. The roads have ditches on both sides that are always full of water. This snake had come out of one ditch and was crossing the road to the other. He covered about 2/3 of the roadway, and a lot of him was still in the ditch! I was in my old orange Pacer station wagon, and decided I needed to run that dude over! When I ran over him, it felt like I'd hit a speed bump at 50 mph! Really shook the car. I looked in the rearview to see if it was dead. He had lifted his head about 3 feet in the air and was staring after me, kind of like "What in tarnation was that orange thing?!!!" Then he just finished his trip across the road with no apparent injury at all!

 

[rousemark]

Yup. Pungo & Back Bay. Don't even get me started on snakes!

Except this one: One day while driving between clients in Back Bay, I saw the biggest water moccasin I have ever encountered crossing the road. The roads have ditches on both sides that are always full of water. This snake had come out of one ditch and was crossing the road to the other. He covered about 2/3 of the roadway, and a lot of him was still in the ditch! I was in my old orange Pacer station wagon, and decided I needed to run that dude over! When I ran over him, it felt like I'd hit a speed bump at 50 mph! Really shook the car. I looked in the rearview to see if it was dead. He had lifted his head about 3 feet in the air and was staring after me, kind of like "What in tarnation was that orange thing?!!!" Then he just finished his trip across the road with no apparent injury at all!

First of all, a pebble feels like a speed bump in a Pacer...Second, you won't hurt a sanke by running over him unless you lock your brakes and skid across him.

 

[goillini52]

First of all, a pebble feels like a speed bump in a Pacer...Second, you won't hurt a sanke by running over him unless you lock your brakes and skid across him.

Sounds like you're experienced at this.

 

[Life Hawk]

Yup. Pungo & Back Bay. Don't even get me started on snakes!

Except this one: One day while driving between clients in Back Bay, I saw the biggest water moccasin I have ever encountered crossing the road. The roads have ditches on both sides that are always full of water. This snake had come out of one ditch and was crossing the road to the other. He covered about 2/3 of the roadway, and a lot of him was still in the ditch! I was in my old orange Pacer station wagon, and decided I needed to run that dude over! When I ran over him, it felt like I'd hit a speed bump at 50 mph! Really shook the car. I looked in the rearview to see if it was dead. He had lifted his head about 3 feet in the air and was staring after me, kind of like "What in tarnation was that orange thing?!!!" Then he just finished his trip across the road with no apparent injury at all!

Loved that car. Brother-in-law had one when I was a young. I would sit in the back and pretend to be a gold fish!

More glass than the Crystal Cathedral!