You know you're a Final Expense agent when...(fill in the blank)

[shonceman]

You get a call from a client whose sister wants insurance, and he wants to give you her number. You're in the middle of wolfing down your lunch as you fly down the highway, so you pull over quick and grab the first piece of paper your hand falls on, a napkin from the bag your lunch was in. You write "Tammy 214-555-5555." You set the napkin on the seat for later retrieval cuz you're in a hurry. You forget about it. That weekend, your wife is sitting in the passenger seat & notices a napkin peeking out from beside the seat....

 

[Heck13]

When you walk into a house and a lady is feeding her blind pet raccoon fruit loops because "that's the only thing he likes" and all you can think is that it must be Tuesday.

 

[WinoBlues]

Oh Ooh, when you door knock an orphan FE policy holder. And the lady's first name is Beauty. Over 100' outside. You walk to the house with the swamp cooler in the window. You knock on the security screen door. You hear someone say "yeah?" in a loud country voice. Just as the wiff of ass and sweat come blasting through the screen. Sadly she invites you in. Beauty, all 300#s of her is in a sweat stained thread bare moomoo. And that is all. As I am sitting on the wood front edge of the damp couch in the dark living room she is standing in front of me with the light behind her. God, please blind me!

Oh almost forgot. Here it is *

 

[Thedude]

When you walk into a house and a lady is feeding her blind pet raccoon fruit loops because "that's the only thing he likes" and all you can think is that it must be Tuesday.

hahahahaha. You knock on the door and you hear what sounds like 150 dogs and the stench hits you and you decide, this is a porch sale.

 

[Agentguy5]

you're making your sales presentation and a granny boob pops out of the robe.

 

[shonceman]

you're making your sales presentation and a granny boob pops out of the robe.

 

[Agentguy5]

Yep, it really did happen too!

 

[goillini52]

Yep, it really did happen too!

When I was in my early 30's I was out cold door knocking and I talked to a woman in her late 70's. She said said she couldn't talk to me now, but to come back that evening.

When I went back I knocked on the door of her trailer and she hollered at me and told me to come on in and have a seat at the kitchen table. I did and thought it odd that there was a hand gun and a bottle of wine on the table. Then that old woman comes strolling in wearing a little leopard print nightie. As soon as she sat down I told her that I was sorry that I had to go because I just remembered that one of my kids had something going on at school and I had just enough time to get there.

I still have nightmares about that.

I'll bet that Todd would have stayed(even though she was a little younger than what he prefers).

 

[dabulls]

1. You go to appointment and accidentally pet the guys stuffed cat cause you think it's still alive.

2 you go to a clients house that is blind and gets stung multiple times by a yellow jacket

3. You go to an appointment and hardcore lesbian porn is on the big screen tv and he cant find the remote to change it

4 you go to an appointment and look over and see a filthy 2 year old chugging a 2 liter of mountain dew with roaches everywhere. Called child services on that one

 

[NSRH]

your prospect was diagnosed with a serious illness, but Jesus healed 'em from it.